TRIAL TIMES: SURVIVOR

 

They say to be completely free...

You have to forgive and forget those people who have hurt you, those that have caused you pain intentionally or unintentionally, those who have messed up your life to the point of ruin, those who have made you shed tears till you felt like death was the only option.

But it's never easy for people whose reality shows the trauma and pain they have been through. Looking at those scars, those memories keep coming back nonstop.

Now a loved one of yours that has been so patient and loving throughout the entire incident suddenly turns their back on you.

Their suppressed anger and thoughts when they felt you were irresponsible and stupid.

Their suppressed anger and thoughts when they felt you made them waste money on hospital bills.

Their suppressed anger and thoughts when they can't really understand the pain and tears you have shed.

Every single thought of theirs that they have hidden just explodes and all you can do is stand in shock, they remind of you those memories that you thought were your past meanwhile they never went away they were just buried even if they didn't mean it...they say in every lie there's an iota of truth.

Even after the whole drama, every day seems to be a potentially bad day for you knowing only you and those medications have the ability to change your written destiny for that day.

After every single damn thing you decide to take charge, you make a pact never to be broken down again so you get something doing like a job.

What a life, even when you decide to occupy yourself people are never understanding , they criticize your ideas, all you can think is I don't belong here but I have to keep on going.

On this fateful day you have been having an awesome day , you decide to share your ideas to promote the business with someone and at the end of the day you just end up feeling ridiculed.

Your boss complains about you giving her attitude and can't deal with you no more.

The world complains about your weight, your family complains about you being moody, your employer complains about everything you do, your confidant doesn't believe in your dreams, the question is after all this pain I have gone through in these past year do I deserve to be treated like this?

 You are a FIGHTER, there are no other words to describe you, you are strong because 1%of those people can't stand what you have been through, you have to hide your scars because you don't want people to judge you or fake pity because of your situation. Our flaws are what makes us distinctive, some of us are called weird because of the way we react after the aftermath of our incident.

I am not perfect, I don't know how to use punctuation marks, I like to use pencils to write instead of pens , I like wearing long gowns and skirts. I like to dance in the middle of the night when everyone is asleep, I love to take pictures of nature, I have stretch marks on my arms that are very visible. I have mood swings almost everyday. THIS IS ME, EMBRACE YOUR UNUSUAL SIDE BECAUSE YOU ARE A SURVIVOR.